Families – Threats – Cohabitation Before Marriage

From our Introductory Post:

“The righteous have sat back and allowed the wicked to take over our relationships to God, families, churches, governments, schools and colleges, journalism, entertainment, sports, sciences, and a whole litany of other endeavors in our society.”

Families – Threats – Cohabitation Before Marriage

In our previous post we considered the topic of Threats to Families, specifically Absentee Fathers. We will now take a look at another threat to the family, Cohabitation Before Marriage.

Now we move into areas that may create some ire among certain readers. Generally, when pet sins are exposed, even professing “christians” take exception. I am really not concerned about sparing feelings at this point so will be as objective as I can about this topic and other topics as they present threats to the family. The usual argument goes something like, “You wouldn’t buy a pair of shoes unless you tried them on!” Excuse me; trying on a pair of shoes does not equate to a lifetime commitment to a man or woman in marriage. Those who take offense need to deal with it between themselves and God.

Before considering the effects of this phenomenon, we should investigate the extent of it. The United States Census Bureau has reported that “. . . the number of cohabiting households increased from 1.1 million in 1977 to 4.9 million 20 years later in 1997. Cohabiting households made up 1.5 percent of all households in 1977, increasing to 4.8 percent by 1997.” A more ominous aspect of the extent of the problem of cohabitation is revealed when we consider that “. . . in 1997, 43 percent of unmarried couple households contained children . . .” and “. . . the proportion of unmarried couple households containing children has increased from 29 percent in 1977 to 43 percent in 1997.” The entire report, Historical Estimates of Cohabitation by Lynne M. Casper, Philip N. Cohen, and Tavia Simmons, may be read at:
http://www.census.gov/population/www/documentation/twps0036/twps0036.html

The June, 2003, Catholic Update reports numerous negative effects of cohabitation such as “higher risk of divorce, less satisfactory adjustments in marriage, harmful effect upon children, ducking tough issues, repressed anger, avoiding criticism of each other’s annoying behavior, failure to develop realistic and satisfactory financial habits, suffering strained relationships with parents, close family members and treasured friends, and struggling with an undercurrent of guilt by this violation of one's conscience or religious upbringing.” See the report, Cohabitation Before Marriage by Joseph M. Champlin, at:
http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/ac0603.asp

The Washington Post is hardly a religious publication. The August 16, 2009, piece, Force of Cohabit: Making or Breaking a Marriage? by Ellen McCarthy, discusses the phenomenon of cohabitation in a somewhat more balanced fashion but is surprisingly negative. Scott “Stanley, a University of Denver psychologist, has spent the past 15 years trying to figure out why premarital cohabitation is associated with lower levels of satisfaction in marriage and a greater potential for divorce.” Stanley discovered that “. . . almost 19 percent of those who lived together before getting engaged had at some point suggested divorce, compared with 10 percent for those who waited until marriage to live together.” "Cohabitation may not be making some relationships more risky," Stanley says. "What it may be doing is making some risky relationships more likely to continue." Read the whole article at: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/08/13/AR2009081304118_pf.html

What is the solution to the problem of cohabitation? It may be nothing more than old fashioned preaching against sin. See “Flee also youthful lusts:” (2 Timothy 2:22) and “Flee fornication.” (1 Corinthians 6:18), among others.

Summary

This post has examined Cohabitation Before Marriage as a major threat to families. We discovered that the solution is found in observing Biblical injunctions. Our next post will take a look at another threat to families, Pornography.

I remain yours in the name of Jesus Christ, the Creator and Name above every name.

“Mr. Phil”